Category Archives: Life
That’s right. It’s not overly fake, pointless reality TV shows. It’s not the supremely talentless and obviously mental LadyGaga. It’s not fake tan that makes people look like they should be incorporated into a traffic light. It’s the thing that us Brits are most stereotyped for other than our supposedly ‘posh’ accents (come pay a visit to South Yorkshire); Tea.
Everyone bloody loves it. My mum, my dad, my sister, my girlfriend, my brother-in-law, my best friends. The list is bloody endless. They all have it a different ‘way’. Some like it with loads of milk, some don’t. Some like spoonfuls of sugar in their’s, others don’t. I like mine like this:
No sugar. No milk. No teabag. JUST WATER PLEASE!
Y’see, I really like water. In fact, sometimes, I’ve gone as far as saying that water is my favourite drink, so much more refreshing than a Dr. Pepper or Sprite, so much less symptomless than cider and Bailey’s (awful stuff). It’s just plain, boring, as-close-to-natural-as-you-can-get water. So why poison it with what is essentially leaves that keep you awake all night and can give you many unwelcome side-effects.
People look at me like I’m crazy when I say I don’t like tea or coffee. Being a Yorkshireman it seems it’s even more of a crime. I’ve tried all the different ‘ways’ you can have it, but I just end up squirming in disgust and wishing for a pint of water. Tea just ain’t my cup o’ tea… wait…
So, all you folk outside of Britain who think us British go around pronouncing our T’s and P’s as precisely as possible, sipping tea and singing God Save Our Gracious Queen, just remember there’s me saying this:
Tea’s blood’eh ‘orrible an’t Queen can begger off!
Ya get me?
Well, aren’t I tackling the massive questions early on! They don’t get much more massive than “Is there a God?”, and like many people in the world religion and the existence of God is a subject that I can talk for England about. It’s not because I’m a particularly religious person. It’s not that I’m a hardened atheist. It’s because I find the whole idea of religion incredibly interesting. Someday, for no spiritual reason, I want to read the Bible. My name’s Michael, I’m twenty-three, and I’m an agnostic.
Yep, I’m a fence-sitter. I’m a sitter of fences. My backside has been neatly perched on the fence. It’s not one of those painful, spiky fences though. It’s actually quite comfortable. And why is it that I’m sat on the fence, other than for metaphorical effect? Well, it’s because of the alternatives.
Take atheism for example. The whole belief that you die and that’s it doesn’t swing with me too much. If I had that state of mind I’d be walking around thinking “what’s the point? It’s unlikely I’ll be remembered by anyone in the future. Existence is futile”, and be a miserable, depressed git who people would rather not speak to. Some atheists are completely ignorant of religious folk, failing to acknowledge that it relies on faith and belief not facts and figures. These people are often… nobheads.
Then there’s theism, the belief in a God, and on the outside it seems quite pleasant. When you die, so long as you’ve led a good life, you go somewhere comforting and serene for the rest of eternity. You’ll have a reunion with friends and family that you were around in your life. On the other side of the coin, though, there may be rules you must obey; you’ll have to go to church, you’ll be sent to hell if you’re a homosexual, and if you use the word “fuck” in the same sentence as “God” then you’re likely to outrage some religious folk. Sorry about that.
Instead, then, I just live my life how I think it should be lived. And if, when I die, I am brought before God in order to repent my sins then I’ll admit I was wrong not to worship Him/Her/It as my creator. But I won’t regret anything I’d done in my life. The way I see it there’s loads more to being a good person than drinking wine and eating bread, singing carols in a church and putting your hands together before a meal.
I don’t need the Bible to tell me that. I want to read it though. To me, it’s a bit like Lord of the Rings or Harry Potter:
A bloody good story!
I’ve read around and have realised that many bloggers, when first starting to create a blog, spend a lot of time trying to think of a niche that they wish to tap in to. Well, my friends, I’ve thought about it and have realised I don’t want one! There’s going to be no common audience. One post could be about something completely different to the one before it. I’m sorry about this, but I do get distracted easily and feel the need to write about something completely different quite often.
What this blog will have are the ramblings of one incredibly shy and reclusive writer. I would expect these ramblings to come in the form of reviews, magazine-style articles and the senseless typing of things that make me angry, sad or happy… but what do I know? ‘Spontaneity’ is my favourite word! Well, either that or ‘foible’… I like that one too.
So if you fancy keeping track of this unpredictable load of old toss then make sure to return. If you feel like it you could make a comment on one of the many things I’ll be writing about. It’d be nice to hear from you, just so long as you have the time. I don’t want to put you out!
Well, would you listen to me! Rambling on already when I could have basically summed up what this blog is by saying this:
I Am What I Write
It’s pretty pretentious but I couldn’t give a shit. It sounds good!